I hear you ask, "is an old Trot like you doing to contribute to the outpouring of jollity and celebration that is currently engulfing the entire nation from Croydon all the way to Watford ?"
How about some jolly celebratory music for starters ?
And then a true (aren't they all ?) story ?
Once upon a time, I was walking round a building site in Maghull. It's where Myrrzeezide kinda morphs into rural Lancashire. My companion was a fearsome looking Scouser - shaven head and tattoos on his spit - of the Blue persuasion. On rounding a corner, we espied a guy from the Portaloo company connecting up the hoses to pump the contents into a waiting tanker.
He was wearing a LFC top.
"Oi" shouts my companion, and the Portaloo guy did a rather superfluous double-take. "You" came the second shout, accompanied by a totally unambiguous pointing finger.
The poor shit-shifter was now obviously shitting himself and apparently suitably set up for the coup de grace - delivered from close-up without a hint of a smile.
"You taking the piss ?"
There's no answer to that.