Tuesday 7 December 2010

Blog Security Notice

Our Head of Blog Security, Big Senga, has informed me that one of The Followers is missing. Our previously happy band of 16 is now deficient to the tune of one.
I immediately suspected that Wing Commander "Jumbo" Sloman had gone "over the wire" as is his wont. However, he responded (if somewhat woodenly !) to his name at the roll-call, so we must look elsewhere for the miscreant. And rest assured, he will be hunted down, dragged back, and will spend several weeks in the cooler playing with his ball.

I must say that I am disappointed . I had thought that I ran an enlightened blog, with none of the gratuitous brutality found elsewhere in the blogosphere. Obviously my trust has been misplaced, and therefore I have no option but to suspend the use of the following items which I had donated to The Followers Social Club
  • The vaulting horse
  • The JCB
  • The dumper
  • The false moustaches
  • The piano
  • The compressor and all the rock-drilling tools
  • Women's clothing (except, of course, for that belonging to the women)
  • The tilting stove.
  • All motorbicycles and microlight aircraft except those for which a valid permit has been issued.
  • All graphical material in the "Visit Switzerland" series issued by the Swiss Tourist Board
  • The passport machine.
  • The pop-up toaster
In addition all work will be suspended on what I am told is an artificial ski slope being constructed beside the eastern perimeter fence
And finally, Followers will no longer be eligible to receive "Red Cross Parcels" from Backpackinglight.

I hope this will serve as a timely warning.

That is all.

Dismiss.

5 comments:

  1. Think of it as making a contribution to Our Nation's shared pain. It's the cuts, you know.

    My bet is that he was Irish.

    (Word = "mantati")

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  2. Not me, but I've joined to boost your numbers. I can't work out why my blogger photo doesn't appear though!

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  3. I seem to be following at a distance.
    Its probably the beta blockers....

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  4. Mr.S.
    Cuts. Cuts. Don't talk to me about cuts !

    Mr.B.
    Welcome aboard. That will even up the numbers for the bridge evenings. Once you have been deloused, I'll find you a spare bunk in Sloman's hut.

    Mr.K.
    Your efforts to keep up are appreciated. Concious of my responsibilities under the DDA (or whatever it is now), I will leave a trail of Bonios so you don't get lost.

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  5. My arrogance is such that I follow no-one...so it wisnae me!

    (in truth I never worked out how to do it...which says a lot about my attention span.)

    What was the question?

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